Choose Your Own "Choose Your Own Adventure"

Colonel Thunder

Renowned Blunderer & Dishonorary Czech
In this thread, whoever wants to post next picks an option left by the post before them. They then continue the story however they want.


Shadow continues to blast "Train Simulator Bitch" from his newly-built mansion next door.

"It's been several hours of non-stop joke songs," grumbles Stealthy, trying to enjoy lunch on his patio. "The only way this could be worse was if he invited Blooky over."

Stealthy decides to take action and secure peace and quiet.

-Stealthy calls the police and submits a noise complaint.
-Stealthy uses an EMP to shut off Shadow's stero. And uh, house.
-Stealthy goes next door and talks to Shadow about it.


Well-Known Member
-Stealthy calls the police and submits a noise complaint.

"Hello, this is the police department, what's the problem, don't talk too loud," a slurred, disoriented voice responds from the other end.

Huh, Stealthy thinks to himself. Money must be getting tight if they've got Bob doing dispatch. "Hey Bob, Shadow's making a shit ton of noise again and I'm trying to eat my Caprese salad in peace here. Can you throw him in jail for the night?"

"Ah, fuck, I said not so loud," comes the disgruntled response. "What's that? Shadow's eating your salad? No, I can't put him in jail, we don't have the funding to send real cops out there. We don't even have the funding to have real cops. I'll just send a pack of rabid coyotes to take care of him, won't be a problem."

"Wait, wha-"

Bob hangs up the line. In a few minutes, 12 rabid coyotes are running straight to Shadow's mansion, ready to tear him to pieces. Stealthy feels he should probably help somehow but he also really wants to finish his salad.

-Stealthy grabs a baseball bat and goes over to the mansion to save his neighbor
-Stealthy politely calls Shadow on the phone and gives him a heads-up about the coyotes
-Stealthy continues to eat his salad without a care in the world
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