Continuous The Forum Court (Tirin v. Thunder: Opening Statements)

Colonel Thunder

Renowned Blunderer
Member
On account of the extensive delay granted to the prosecution, my representative @BlookyHannah is no longer able to fulfill her intended role as my attorney at this time. Rather than treat the court's time as frivolously as my opponents have, I will be representing myself instead of asking for an extension with which to find another attorney.

Does the Court find this agreeable?
 

Colonel Thunder

Renowned Blunderer
Member
Thank you, your Honor.

The prosecution would do well to cite evidence and bring forth witnesses regarding these charges before breaking into hysterics regarding my character.

The Danger per dollar and custom stream message incentives for donating apply to cash donations to the stream's Tip Jar, as has always been my policy. This has been outlined by the text that scrolls on the bottom of my streams for over a year now. Donating software (especially those that my business did not ask for) have no history of qualifying for the aforementioned incentives.
 
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Tirin

God-Emperor of Tealkind
Moderator
Regardless of the outline of your text scrolls, it is terribly clear that donating software does, in fact, have a history of qualifying for the aforementioned incentives (or, at least, demonstrably an equivalent amount of Danger.
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7.jpg
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We can see here that despite his claim that "Game donations don't, uh, net any danger..", TC has previously given Dragonruby compensation of 300 Danger for his donation of the game Nier, which (apparently) cost Druby $30. Clearly there is precedent for Danger compensation for "indirect donations", and it is clear that Bob's game was donated to the stream and played on it, I think it is self-evident that my client should be compensated with 100 Danger (provided that he can show a receipt demonstrating that he did, in fact, pay $10 for his donated game).

I would also like to point out that on the streamlabs website for DangerVideoGames the claim is made that "All donations go towards the stream in the form of games, and maybe one day a beefier computer"; it further provides a wishlist consisting at this time of the games Superhot and Driver: San Francisco. To me, this indicates that games played on stream should be treated as equivalent to monetary donations of their purchase price, provided that they are actually purchased at that price instead of, for example, redeemed through a gifted Steam key or etcetera.

Your Honor, I would like to call @Colonel Thunder to the stand, as I have a pertinent question regarding one of his donations mentioned in the images above.
 

Easy

Right Honorable Justice
Member
@Colonel Thunder

Do you solemnly swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, answering all relevant questions posed by either attorney fully and accurately, to the best of your ability, no matter how tangential the relevance and however self-incriminating the answer may be, or else accept, before all forumers previous, future, and current, that your own worth is no greater than that of a gay-ass, baby-ass, stupid-ass, worthless-ass Czech pride stinking bitch?

The court is advised that failure to answer this query in the affirmative does not preclude witnesses from testifying or attorneys from operating. Failure to answer the presiding Justice's direct address, however, does, until such time as a worthy answer has been provided.
 

Easy

Right Honorable Justice
Member
@Tirin

Be advised that the Defendant, being that he is acting as his own Attorney in this matter, bears the right to cross-examination of any Witness questioned by the Prosecution, including himself.
 

Tirin

God-Emperor of Tealkind
Moderator
Very good. I would also like to know if you did, in fact, play Bob's game on stream as he has claimed, and if so for approximately how long.
 

Colonel Thunder

Renowned Blunderer
Member
The footage has been deleted by the Twitch servers, as is normal. However, if the game we are discussing is the Whistleblower DLC for Outlast, then the playtime would be about 2 hours and 30 minutes.

I had no intention of playing this game, nor did I ask for it to be donated. However, due to popular demand I played it on stream in its entirety as a courtesy (not an obligation) to your client.
 

Tirin

God-Emperor of Tealkind
Moderator
The fact remains that you did play it on stream, and the fact that it generated demand and thus popularity and views for your stream to begin with says more than enough as to its value as a donation, particularly given that you have compensated forumers with Danger for game donations before.

No further questions, though I would like to call @The Hound to the stand if TC has no objections to my doing so.
 

Easy

Right Honorable Justice
Member
@Colonel Thunder

Any follow-up for Witness Thunder?

@The Hound

Do you solemnly swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, answering all relevant questions posed by either attorney fully and accurately, to the best of your ability, no matter how tangential the relevance and however self-incriminating the answer may be, or else accept, before all forumers previous, future, and current, that your own worth is no greater than that of a gay-ass, baby-ass, stupid-ass, worthless-ass Czech pride stinking bitch?

The court is advised that failure to answer this query in the affirmative does not preclude witnesses from testifying or attorneys from operating. Failure to answer the presiding Justice's direct address, however, does, until such time as a worthy answer has been provided.
 

The Hound

Just Monika
Member
I do, your honor.

I will apologize ahead of time but I will be out of town much of this weekend but I will make a concerted effort to make time to answer any and all questions.
 

Colonel Thunder

Renowned Blunderer
Member
Thank you for the courtesy reminder, your Honor.

I am glad to answer the question brought to me.

The game that Druby donated, "NieR: Automata" was a game listed on the official stream wishlist which Tirin linked to earlier. If a viewer donates a game on that official wishlist, that software donation is acceptable for the reward of Danger and a custom stream message, same as cash.
 

Colonel Thunder

Renowned Blunderer
Member
Thank you for answering, attractive witness.

However, it is now reasonable to conclude that the wishlist-games-being-an-exception policy is not as clearly outlined as it could be for viewers. A viewer like Bob may misunderstand that policy and make a donation off the wishlist, and still expect Danger in return. Wouldn't you agree?
 

Colonel Thunder

Renowned Blunderer
Member
Thank you for asking, intelligent examiner.

I agree with your assessment. Over two years of streaming, this is the first time that a viewer has been confused as to this "wishlist exception" policy. My immediate reaction was to clarify the language used outlining donation policies so that no future viewers would be confused. However, because this debacle was quickly headed to the courtroom, I found it would be a breach of justice to update the language before or during this trial. Naturally, as soon as this trial is concluded, I will update the language so that in two years another viewer will not misinterpret stream donation policy.
 

Colonel Thunder

Renowned Blunderer
Member
Thank you for answering, charming witness.

What of the Prosecution's note on the donation page, which reads, "All donations go towards the stream in the form of games, and maybe one day a beefier computer?". Does this not seem to imply that game and cash donation are equal?
 
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