Chapter 14: Please Hold
"Who dares summon the creator and destroyer of life!?" boomed a loud voice.
White-hot fire doused Dunsparce's ceiling. A massive creature made of living fire and covered in molten armor and chains appeared in the summoning circle.
"My allies fear me as much as my enemies," the creature growled to Dunsparce. "You are foolish to call me into this plane, puny mortal! For what purpose have you summoned the one called 'Fire Demon'!"
"There's a Cookie War going on," said Dunsparce, holding a fire extinguisher. "My name's Dunsparce. Berserker, I require your mighty powers to defeat my enemies."
"Oh," said the creature with a quieter voice. The flames mostly dissipated to reveal a stocky man made of calmly flickering living fire. "Well, why didn't you say so? That makes perfect sense."
Dunsparce sprayed his ceiling with the fire extinguisher until the flames were gone.
"Those flames weren't actually going to burn anything," said Fire Demon, annoyed. "They were just for show."
"You can create illusions too?" said Dunsparce. "I thought you were a mindless brute of unending destruction?"
"Ha!" laughed Fire Demon, and his fire grew for a moment. "Destruction is just the beginning of my legacy! I was a skilled chemist named Kaidart before I fused with a demonic creature and overtook it's mind. I promise you, I have the most diverse skill set of any Berserker out there!"
"Really?" asked Dunsparce. "None of that is in your Biography in the Cookie Series. You're a powerful hero, for sure. But you're just raw destructive power. Kind of a min-maxer. Good to know you're even better tha-"
"History did not note my greatest attributes!?" bellowed Fire Demon. This time, the heat was real. "Show me the records, immediately!"
Dunsparce went to his computer and opened the Cookie War game. He clicked 'Roster' to view the selection of heroes.
"Intelligence of 7!?" yelled Fire Demon. "I discovered the demonic plane and advanced medicine by generations! I did the former while drunk, too!"
"This is good," assured Dunsparce. "This means everyone will underestimate you. We can-"
"They mention the mackerel, right?" asked Fire Demon. "Or the prized chalice I stole from a foolish king? They can't of missed those."
"Little is known of Fire Demon's human life," Dunsparce read from the biography. "However, historians believe he was an abhorrently evil person who drew the attention and admiration of demonic entities. He-"
"I took two samples from the market, one time!" yelled Fire Demon. "How do I find the dead men who created these vile lies!?"
"What's important is that our enemies don't know you're so...diversely skilled," said Dunsparce. "Let's just focus on the War, and after that we can-"
"Ah, there's a 'Contact' section!" said Fire Demon, pushing Dunsparce out of the way. "Give me your device to contact them!"
Dunsparce opened his mouth to protest, but a tendril of flame reached from Fire Demon into Dunsparce's sweatshirt pocket and took his phone.
"This won't take long, mortal," said Fire Demon, placing the phone to his ear. "I'll win your War soon. But this! THIS! Is important!"
Dunsparce sighed and grabbed the fire extinguisher.
"Who dares summon the creator and destroyer of life!?" boomed a loud voice.
White-hot fire doused Dunsparce's ceiling. A massive creature made of living fire and covered in molten armor and chains appeared in the summoning circle.
"My allies fear me as much as my enemies," the creature growled to Dunsparce. "You are foolish to call me into this plane, puny mortal! For what purpose have you summoned the one called 'Fire Demon'!"
"There's a Cookie War going on," said Dunsparce, holding a fire extinguisher. "My name's Dunsparce. Berserker, I require your mighty powers to defeat my enemies."
"Oh," said the creature with a quieter voice. The flames mostly dissipated to reveal a stocky man made of calmly flickering living fire. "Well, why didn't you say so? That makes perfect sense."
Dunsparce sprayed his ceiling with the fire extinguisher until the flames were gone.
"Those flames weren't actually going to burn anything," said Fire Demon, annoyed. "They were just for show."
"You can create illusions too?" said Dunsparce. "I thought you were a mindless brute of unending destruction?"
"Ha!" laughed Fire Demon, and his fire grew for a moment. "Destruction is just the beginning of my legacy! I was a skilled chemist named Kaidart before I fused with a demonic creature and overtook it's mind. I promise you, I have the most diverse skill set of any Berserker out there!"
"Really?" asked Dunsparce. "None of that is in your Biography in the Cookie Series. You're a powerful hero, for sure. But you're just raw destructive power. Kind of a min-maxer. Good to know you're even better tha-"
"History did not note my greatest attributes!?" bellowed Fire Demon. This time, the heat was real. "Show me the records, immediately!"
Dunsparce went to his computer and opened the Cookie War game. He clicked 'Roster' to view the selection of heroes.
"Intelligence of 7!?" yelled Fire Demon. "I discovered the demonic plane and advanced medicine by generations! I did the former while drunk, too!"
"This is good," assured Dunsparce. "This means everyone will underestimate you. We can-"
"They mention the mackerel, right?" asked Fire Demon. "Or the prized chalice I stole from a foolish king? They can't of missed those."
"Little is known of Fire Demon's human life," Dunsparce read from the biography. "However, historians believe he was an abhorrently evil person who drew the attention and admiration of demonic entities. He-"
"I took two samples from the market, one time!" yelled Fire Demon. "How do I find the dead men who created these vile lies!?"
"What's important is that our enemies don't know you're so...diversely skilled," said Dunsparce. "Let's just focus on the War, and after that we can-"
"Ah, there's a 'Contact' section!" said Fire Demon, pushing Dunsparce out of the way. "Give me your device to contact them!"
Dunsparce opened his mouth to protest, but a tendril of flame reached from Fire Demon into Dunsparce's sweatshirt pocket and took his phone.
"This won't take long, mortal," said Fire Demon, placing the phone to his ear. "I'll win your War soon. But this! THIS! Is important!"
Dunsparce sighed and grabbed the fire extinguisher.